I will speak as one of you, for isn’t that the case?  I have spoken harsh words in a zeal for the will of the living God.  Accusations have come from my lips.  Challenges have been sent out.  Yet you have not heard the full of what I have to say.  I have restrained my words for the sake of your faith.

You do not know it, but no one has responded either good or bad.  But how should that be of any concern to you?  What is of concern to you, is what I have done.  Isn’t the question put forth, “Who is this who speaks such vehement words against his brothers”?

I am simply a fool who is coming to adore the living God in Christ Jesus.  My eyes are beginning to see clearly that he alone is worthy of praise. 

I was like you, listening to those words.  We sang all the praise songs.  We prayed good words before our version of the living God.  We even hugged one another now and then.  Yet all that worship left me empty.

Sermons were preached, but my ears would not receive the words.  My life drifted into religion, just like those who live the life I have condemned.  I found myself no more than an empty cup, abandoned on the corner of the sidewalk; alone and worthless for the will of my God.

But God has been merciful to this man.  He has struck me with isolation.  He has filled my heart with a desire to learn about his Holy Way.  He has been patient and merciful to show me my failings.  And through his lovely fire, condemnation has come strong.

He accepted no excuse from me.  His truth hovered over me.  I could not sleep, I could not wake, I could not eat or enjoy, without that the knowledge that condemnation was sure.  Curiously enough, all my waking days, I provoked his appearance all the more.  Echoing in my heart is the concept of refining gold by fire.  May it never leave me!

This is the man I am.  I am a Christian, because he has made me into one.  And he is far short of finished.

I speak to you as if I am a new Christian.  You know the zeal of those who suddenly understand.  But I am beside myself to explain why this understanding of zeal diminishes!  I cannot explain why my brothers pat such children on the head, and nod with understanding.  “You will soon settle down.  So we will put up with your words for now.”

They should not be settled down!  They should be joining a band of elders who are the same as they!  The wisdom of a child is greater then the wisdom of a domesticated elder!  This child is not joining a band of warriors!  He is encouraged to take his place among those who live at peace!  All the while the world dies around us!  And the will of God suffers for our lack of zeal!

I have simply determined to believe Him.  I am no great prophet.  I do not part the waters.  I do not heal the sick or raise the dead.  I have simply determined to believe the words of my Lord.

Will you ignore me, or join me?  Truly, will you come and pat me on the head?  Will you secretly read my words and roll your eyes?

With that said, this article is finished.  For my heart perceives the answer.

By His Grace


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s