Those who know me, know that in my past I have been an agent for destruction. Everywhere I went, I destroyed lives. Selfishness was all I knew. I had no respect for anyone else’s life, or prosperity. Only God knows how much of that man is dead.
But a new man has risen from the carcass. This one is thoroughly ashamed of such behavior. He strives to let people be more than himself. But again, only God knows how much.
I did the things I did out of habit. One might say out of compulsion. And I don’t know how many of those habits or how much selfish compulsion to be destructive still lives in my mind. All I know is that I strive everyday, all day, to be a different man.
Prayer has become often and earnest. With a great abandon, I have thought the truth of God through and through. To the point that what you see written in this blog is likely less than 1/8 the volume. And with all my might I strive to do the things I learn.
I’m not trying to praise myself. And it would be ridiculous to look for pity. For justice remembers that I had no pity on others.
I write this for the sake of those who are like I was. I write this that you may know there is a way out. And the exit door has a name, Jesus the Christ of God. But I also wrote this as a testimony to what you can expect.
You can expect to remember what you’ve done. You can expect the Lord Jesus to forgive your sins. You can expect God to teach you how to put selfishness away. You can expect him to teach you the real meaning of love. You can even expect to become quite trustworthy.
But you cannot expect those who knew the man you were, to trust you. Just as you will not forget the man you were, they remember all the more.
But doesn’t that painful experience give you a magnificent opportunity to be humble, forgiving, patient and understanding? And aren’t those four attributes foundations for love?
You can expect that becoming the new man will be a horribly painful experience. But I have determined, it is about time I tasted my own medicine. And the Lord Jesus reassures me that the pain will be worth it all.
By His Grace