That Fully Peculiar Sadness

I perceived a sadness within me.  Did it belong to me? 

A cursory search of my soul says no, this sadness does not belong to me.  Joy belongs to me, for it is given to me by the Holy One of God.

Then to whom does this sadness belong?  Doesn’t it belong to those who do not believe?  Yes to those who don’t believe.

My soul stands at the door of heaven and looks back.  I don’t see an excited horde rushing toward the door of Christ.  I see all men milling about with frantic enthusiasm for everything that is futile.

The sadness I am feeling is that, Man is not sad at all.  Like condemned men who stand against the wall of a firing squad, yet celebrate the place where they stand.  Mindless and blind as to what comes next, they busy themselves with an obvious joy.

We can only speak of what we have been told.  He who receives receives, he who does not receive is the source of my sadness.

So be it.  God is first in Christ.  It is to him I owe allegiance.  This sadness will not consume me, even as a foolish enjoy consumes all men around me.

By His Grace


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